|Non-Blameful Description of||Simple
|The Situation||When _____________||Briefly describe the situation without judgment, blame or attack; for example:|
When the dirty dishes are left in the den.
|My Emotion(s)||I feel ______________||Use only one word to describe your emotion in that situation: glad, mad, sad, scared, etc.; for example:|
When the dirty dishes are left in the den, I feel angry.
|My Reason(s)||because ______________||Briefly describe your reason for feeling that way in that situation; for example:|
When the dirty dishes are left in the den, I feel angry because the room was clean when I left.
|My Vision||I'd like ______________||Picture how good the future would look if the gap got closed between what is (the problem) and what is wanted (the goal), then vividly describe what you want:|
I'd like to come home to a clean house, be free to converse with you and get close to you.
|My Request||Will you _____________?||Ask for the first step toward making your vision come true:|
Will you please pick up your dishes when you finish with them?
Read about the Four Levels of Communication.